After I changed my youngest into his pajamas last night, we proceeded to join my oldest in a round of legos, I was unusually quiet. So quiet that my two-year old asked me to start talking to his younger brother. “Momma, talk to Trev-Trev”, he said. He’s intuitive in that way. He could tell I was deep in thought. Good thoughts. I was thinking about my mom, Aida. I was wondering if she enjoyed moments like we were having. Legos. Pajama snuggles. Good night hugs and kisses. Heart warming moments. Listening to my sons babble back and forth with each other. Giggles to no end. Watching my youngest give his big brother a hug with a smile, as wide as river, on his face. Remembering a hug can say it all.
That’s the most obvious answer.
Of course, she loved those moments.
I was thinking about her because this day marks when the Lord took her home to be with Jesus forever. In fact, it marks 20 years. It seems like such a long time. Big number. 20. Seems significant and surreal. Twenty. Much of my life feels surreal.
Now I do the things she did well and loved. Staying home to raise our boys. Playing with them. Having fun in the kitchen with them. Tousling their hair. Tickling their back.
20 years is long time to miss someone. It feels like I’ve lived two different lives. Of which I do. Two different childhoods. Two different beliefs of god. Here’s the silver lining: the Lord is good. Because missing her now, doesn’t hurt. It makes me thankful for what the Lord gave me. How he filled the voids in my heart thereafter with Himself, the promise of His scriptures, people, and the life He has given me. How could I ever be angry at a God who has blessed me beyond measure; beyond what I deserve? Just because of one thing in my life? Now that would be silly.
William is great at being sensitive to what I’m feeling. He asked me how I was doing as mothers day was approaching. I told him I was so thankful for the 12 years we had together. Better to have had 12 fabulous years than 50 mediocre years. Thank you Lord for 12 wonderful years.
It was amazing! Completely last-minute. William & I were both thinking of it, then finally said something to one another and we were so excited to plan and prep! We were giddy with anticipation. To celebrate what the Lord has given us. My husband. My son’s father. Living life together. I’m so thankful.
We were truly overwhelmed by how many of our wonderful friends and family popped by to give us hug, celebrate with us and have a margarita! It really is a humbling response to look around and realize how many people love and support us. As we hope to do for them. Of course, during the illness it was the same wonderfully, overwhelming response. The huge amount of support that came around us. But, this weekend, it was in celebration. Not grief. Praise be to God!
Thank for rejoicing with us! It’s easy to move on with life and forget how amazing our God really is. How he showed Himself in a very dynamic way last summer. His healing, restoration, answered prayers, support, grace and love. So, thanks for stopping for a moment to celebrate His glory!
A friend, Cathy, shared an announcement with the group. She heard the song titled What a Difference a Day Makes. She mentioned, on 5/4/11, we were unsure of William’s survival. A day later he wakes and after hearing nurse Tara say it’s 5/5/11, he proceeds to say “It’s Cinco de Mayo” and asks for a margarita. Cathy pointed out what he said showed right then and there, not only was God giving him back to us, his brain was active and working! I never thought of it that way. What a difference a day makes.
To all who couldn’t be there, you were missed! And, to my best friend, on the verge of tears because she couldn’t be here … Take a look. You were there for it all!!!
How much better does it get than my aunt Sabah coming to visit from New Jersey. Crying as she meets my boys, tears of joy. I love her being here. Her & I are very close and there’s never anything left unspoken about. She was one of those pillar women in my life who stepped up as a mom to me and my brothers, after my mom passed. I adore her and am cherising my time with her.
As I told my friends, adopted mom Tracy, and my mother in law that she was coming in; They all replied with the same response, “Aunt Baklava?! Oh, yeah!” She loves that story. I call her “mam” – in arabic, meaning, “my aunt.”
I love when we get to catch up with friends & family who live far away! Recently friends of ours, Alexis & Shane, got married and our sweet, lovable friends, Blake & Katelin came into town for the wedding! YEAH!
Here’s my handsome husband & I dressed up for the wedding reception! They had a private ceremony a few weeks earlier and a backyard reception that was drizzled with love and personal sentiment! I loved it!!!
I must explain this picture … goofiness, included. I set the camera to a timer and forgot to tell everyone that it was going to take 10 at a time. One’s bound to turn out of all of us, I figured! As the camera kept snapping, everyone got more relaxed and started laughing. My favorite pictures are totally candid and usually when someone is laughing! I love the *joy* that is in someone’s face and body when they’re laughing!
And, for another sweet surprise. My cousin, Danny, came into town. He’s holding Trevie looking so affectionatley at him. I adore Danny. Always have. He’s got a heart of gold and reminds me of my brother, Chris, in that way. He always makes me laugh and is so darn handsome!
Top right, my cousin, Elias also came to town and I haven’t seen him since I was about 14.
Thank you everybody for visiting with us! We’re honored to know you and the 4 Simmons’ had a blast seeing you again!
Happy Birthday To You
Happy Birthday To You
Happy Birthday To My Favorite Person: William!
Happy Birthday To You
True to form, Will’s request for his birthday was to have a quiet night at home. And, it was fabulous. Rick & Bea stopped by for a little while and we enjoyed their company and the brownies that came with them! (Which ended up being my naughty breakfast today…coffee + sweets = weak in the knees!)
We had a delicious dinner; enjoyed each other’s company; and started the night reading Psalms 91. This was the first scripture our pastor (Heath) led the church in prayer for William’s recovery. We reminisced over the gift God gave us in Will’s life; and what he spared us from two and a half months ago. I couldn’t help but think what yesterday could have been like; but instead, we focused on God’s goodness that He pours to us and can simply say, “thank you.” It was a perfect evening for my wonderful husband. Happy birthday babe! Here’s to many more birthdays together; I love you!
(If you’ve never read Psalms 91, here it is. I’ve bolded the section which our pastor focused our prayer for William)
My Refuge and My Fortress
1He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will abide in the shadow of the Almighty.
2I will say to the LORD, “My refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.”
3For he will deliver you from the snare of the fowler
and from the deadly pestilence.
4He will cover you with his pinions,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness is a shield and buckler.
5 You will not fear the terror of the night,
nor the arrow that flies by day,
6nor the pestilence that stalks in darkness,
nor the destruction that wastes at noonday.
7A thousand may fall at your side,
ten thousand at your right hand,
but it will not come near you.
8You will only look with your eyes
and see the recompense of the wicked.
9Because you have made the LORD your dwelling place—
the Most High, who is my refuge—
10 no evil shall be allowed to befall you,
no plague come near your tent.
11 For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways.
12On their hands they will bear you up,
lest you strike your foot against a stone.
13You will tread on the lion and the adder;
the young lion and the serpent you will trample underfoot.
14“Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him;
I will protect him, because he knows my name.
15When he calls to me, I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble;
I will rescue him and honor him.
16With long life I will satisfy him
and show him my salvation.”
But here’s a real picture of our family of 3 before we become a family of 4!
And finally, Happy 4th! Here are the boys swimming together and watching fireworks. Also had to include this little picture of the 3 of us because I love the expression on Cartie’s face!
I’ve never loved being home more than I do right now. So simple and peaceful with the ones I love. What a beautiful gift the Lord gave us.
Day 1 of being home has gone well. We’re both exhausted so please pray for us that we get enough rest this week. Will’s antibiotic treatment has us busy all day long. The last one finishes at midnight and the first starting at 5:30am. So, I’m taking this as prep for baby #2!
Learning how to administer his medication had me completely worried. Anything medically related is not my comfort zone. In fact, it usually sends chills up my spine. Home health care came to teach us and after completely screwing up my first test (pulling out the entire syringe as to make it pour on the floor…to which, me, Will, Tracy, & Katie just bursted laughing over. The nurse didn’t quite see the humor as we did. Well, thank the Lord, it was only sodium chloride.) After that, I got the hang of it pretty well. It’s been going great!!
Home in and of itself is theraputic. I feel our spirits already lighter just being here. Home health care came again today to draw Will’s blood just to ensure he’s being given the correct dosage of vancomycin. Will’s been walking around really well; even without the walker. Taking life a little bit slower; but so sweet!! We’ve both become slightly paranoid (in a good way), taking his fever every couple hours and double checking everything we do.
I must say while we were gone, there were angels that came in and cleaned our home. They flowed in like a domino effect and we almost didn’t recognize this place; it was spectacular! Thank you so much! Our neighbors kept the lawn, garden, and plants looking great. And, we even came home to baby grapes on the grapevine!
Thanks to everyone for helping us getting settled back in. We could not have done it without your love and support! Wow, have we really seen what the “body” of Christ actually looks like when people rally around you in love.